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“Red Kettle Rhymes” by Tarzana Joe and a “FMH” Update

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Two things:

First, our campaign to help the Salvation Army continues in full flood.  Tarzana Joe has leaked me tomorrow’s poem, available as all his verse is at, but worth a sneak peak to prompt giving:

“Red Kettle Rhymes” by Tarzana Joe

In Spring, the birds are singing
And in gardens, pretty petals
While now, the bells are ringing
And on corners, there are kettles

Those birds and buds embody
The renewal they proclaim
The coins inside those kettles…
Well, the do about the same

That flowering empowers
The potential in the earth
Your contributions also
Are a part of that rebirth

For where the lost and least
Are waiting, whispering a prayer
Your gracious generosity
Can put an Army there

So when you feel the spirit
And you’re doing as you should
Make sure, then, that you’re giving
Where you’re doing the most good

The Army that I speak of
Is essential to our nation
Named and motivated
By the promise of Salvation

The hosts who speak for Salem
Are committed to their mission
And each year they engage in
Somewhat friendly competition

Prager’s in the running
But Bill Bennett’s in the tank
Gallagher’s so far ahead
We think he robbed a bank.

I urge you to contribute
And I’m confident you’ll do it
So please go click the button
By the picture of Hugh Hewitt

With your participation
Hewitt’s vic’try is a cinch
So please go make it happen
Or he’ll turn into the Grinch.

And thanks to all of you who have inquired about the Fetching Mrs. Hewitt who collided with the glass door at The Apple Store this morning.  The raccoon eyes, gash and broken nose are a bit painful, but she is a daughter of the USMC and fine.  As I noted on the show first hour today, after I had placed her in the EMT’s care for a trip to the  local Waikiki hospital for X-ray and a glue stick, I asked her if I should go to the studio and broadcast — show time was imminent and zero chance of finding a guest host– or accompany her to the ER.  She waived me off, and off I went.  (In my defense, I knew she was going to be fine if in some discomfort for a few weeks.)  I put the question to the audience on the soundness of my call, and the married women broke 50/50 pro and con. By contrast, married men were overwhelmingly condemning of my choice, warning I shall hear of this in the next 32 years of marriage.  Perhaps. Lileks opined it shall be kept by FMH in reserve, like a suitcase nuke, for deployment at a dinner party, and he’s been married a long time too.  Our pal, gifted illustrator Steve Bjorkman, dashed off the definite treatment of the situation every husband faces when confronting a choice between accompanying his wife to the ER or going to work (or play), which I offer to all young married men out there who will confront similar situations in the years ahead:

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